heroines of my dreams

about the whole “Geek Girl” and “can you also be sexy?” debate and everything else that’s rolled into it. I haven’t dug my way into the middle of things, or pursued to full extent everything that’s gone on in the recent months, but that doesn’t stop me from offering some personal thoughts.

I noticed a lot of people liking or reblogging the article and quote I put up yesterday and decided to type out some of my personal thoughts on my geek identity.

I’ve identified as a “fangirl” for several years, although the title has never been a favorite of mine. There’s all this negativity surrounding it. I still relate to the ID, though, and often I’ll wear it with pride. However, when Team Unicorn came out with the “G33k & G4m3r Girls” video, I realized I finally had an identity I could totally get behind. Thus I proudly identify as a Geek and Gamer Girl. Simple as that. Before my “fangirl” status seemed slightly separate from my “gamer” identity, although of course fangirl or fanboy does include gaming. Anyway, the video/song captured my attention because I could relate to just about every single line. Plus it claimed this positive image in a song I really wasn’t fond of. Following the video’s release, crap hit the fan as people began slogging out a (sometimes vicious!) debate about the compatibly of sexy women with “geek.”

Now, I don’t think I’m sexy. I don’t think I’m unattractive either. I identify as female and I like wearing jeans, skirts that don’t bare my ass, and dresses. I like tight-fitting shirts and I like loose-fit shirts. I like wearing make-up when I want to. I like my hair long, but I also enjoyed it very short. I have boobs. I like having breasts. I like being female. And I don’t mind if you call me girl as long as you aren’t using it condescendingly or patronizingly. In the same vein, I’ll be pissed if you refer to me as female or woman with a condescending or patronizing or nasty tone. I know this isn’t the case for all people, but for me? Hell, I love the Geek Girl title. It’s me damn it, and I don’t want someone telling me that embracing that means I have to not dress sexy, not bring attention to my breasts, not enjoy shows or games or whatever that happen to include sexist scenes and characters. (Case in point: I love The A-Team. I’m a total fan. However, it is also very clearly a show of its time and catered to men. Despite this, I look beyond and enjoy the hell out of the show.)

It seems so silly to me to argue about who can claim a Geek identity. I know some argue that we shouldn’t have to specify gender like “geek girl” or “female gamer.” (Even “fangirl” and “fanboy.”) Well, sure, ideally saying “geek” should bring up a horde (har har) of images in our brain of the diverse fans out there. Does that mean you should scold me for saying I’m a geek girl? I don’t think so. And if I decide to cosplay, why should I be limited? Some people claim women shouldn’t put themselves on display to cater to fanboys’ desires. Well look, I know some gals might have that motivation, but if I decide to dress up as Poison Ivy and strut my stuff, I can damn well guarantee I’m doing so because I want to. And if I decide to cosplay as Hellboy, I shouldn’t be shunned for “acting like a boy” or failing to fine a strong female character to dress up as. Let me decide who I’d like to roleplay or portray.

Saying female geeks can’t be sexy or shouldn’t be promoted as sexy is stupid. Women are as diverse a bunch as men. Even if we “limit” it to the geek world. I mean, think about it. The image of the “geek” is one of two: (1) this scrawny kid with glasses, great in the maths and sciences, and a computer wiz; (2) overweight, ill-shaven, long-haired, “can’t-grow-up” Dungeons & Dragons obsessee. Now is that the case? Geeks range in all shapes, sizes, creeds, interests, genders, and sexualities. It’s silly to obsess over how we should look.

The thing we should be looking at, if we’re going to talk about gender and specifically, women, is the matter of getting more female characters into the geeky realms. We continue to suffer a lack of face-time and character development in gaming particularly, and even on the larger scale, we continue to be small actors in the comic realms. Luckily there’s some excellent women and men out there speaking up for the diversity in the fandoms and realms we love to geek out about.

I believe that’s all of my rant for now. Feel free to ask questions, drop comments, or what-have-you into the ask box. (Disclaimer: post is unedited, forgive any typoes. If they really distract you, drop me a note and I’ll get to it.)